Nope I’m not talking about Uptown Funk either. I wish it was the fill up my cup, Julio get the stretch kind. That I wouldn’t mind so much. Okay, enough lyric dropping. You may have picked up on my mindset from comments I’ve made recently. I’ve been having lots of questions about my place in life. The big grad school debate anyone?
I feel stuck. It seems everyone around me is moving on and building their lives while I’m just stationary. Somedays I even feel like I’ve taken more steps backward than anything. I wonder where I keep going wrong. I know I’ve had my successes and there’s always positive spots in each day, but I don’t feel like I’m doing anything concrete to move my life in the direction it should be headed. I know the life I want, I just don’t know what gets me there. That’s the frustrating part.
While I long ago threw out my childhood timeline for life (I thought I should be married and have babies, YES MULTIPLE, by 25. Yeah, right. I definitely don’t want either of those things now, nor am I sure I ever do anymore.) I am at an age where I expected to have my shit together far more than I currently have achieved. It’s hard not to wonder about life. With engagements, babies, cross country moves and more – you’re often left pondering your own circumstances while celebrating others. Am I making the right choices? Most days I couldn’t tell you.
I know many of us are figuring it out as we go along, but it’s been nice to see similar posts in the blogging world. Take Kasey‘s and Adriana‘s for example. It was confirmation that I’m not the only one struggling. We all are just hardwired to not admit readily admit our worries.
I still am unsure of lots of things and the future holds a giant question mark. I guess I need to learn that in itself is okay. Now, this doesn’t mean I won’t stop throwing out drastic life changes as ideas that sound great in my mind. In the last 24 hours I’ve latched onto the idea of solo road tripping the span of the Pacific Coast highway this summer. Some kind of Wild spiritual journey for the city girl. I don’t know, it will probably change again soon. Tomorrow it will probably be dying my hair pink.
Of course Tumblr understood me with some hilarious posts, these may be my favorite finds on that site. They’re very fitting don’t you think?
What do you do when you’re feeling lost?
P.S. – I’ve been loving spending every minute outside now that it’s warm out, of course this has all been accompanied by the perfect playlist. Hello Spring!
Until next time,